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<title><![CDATA[英文剧本: 疯狂农庄 Barnyard]]></title>
<link>http://www.130q.com/show.php?tid=1551</link>
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<p>英文剧本: 疯狂农庄 Barnyard&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;</p>
<p>&nbsp;</p>
<p>Barnyard script</p>
<p>All right, now.</p>
<p>I'm just heading to the fields, Duke. I'll be back.</p>
<p>Clear!</p>
<p>Hey, Jerry, how's your mama?</p>
<p>Oh, yeah, it's a beautiful day. Well, time to go to work.</p>
<p>Morning, Ben.</p>
<p>Thanks, Miles.</p>
<p>Let me know if you see Otis.</p>
<p>I'm staying out of that one.</p>
<p>-Okay, meeting's in five minutes. -Okay, boss.</p>
<p>And I want everyone present.</p>
<p>Duke, have you seen Otis?</p>
<p>Nope, I haven't seen him.</p>
<p>Now where was l? Oh, oh, yeah.</p>
<p>The Jersey cows.</p>
<p>-Hey, Benny boy. -Hi.</p>
<p>Hey, you seen Otis around?</p>
<p>Yes, I know exactly where Otis is.</p>
<p>You boys just steer clear of Otis, all right?</p>
<p>Anything you say there, Ben.</p>
<p>We'll take a rain check on the meeting, though.</p>
<p>-Yeah, rain check. -Yeah, that. Check.</p>
<p>Hey.</p>
<p>Hey, I stepped in something. What's on my hoof?</p>
<p>Etta?</p>
<p>-Otis? -Oh, Ben, don't worry.</p>
<p>I'm sure he's heading for the meeting right now.</p>
<p>Okay, let go. Let go. I got it.</p>
<p>-He said, &quot;Let go.&quot; -All right. He's okay.</p>
<p>All right, boys, here's the dealio.</p>
<p>It's a little creation of mine I like to call &quot;hill surfing.&quot;</p>
<p>-Watch your hoof. -I'll spot you. I'll spot you.</p>
<p>Are you sure this is safe, Otis?</p>
<p>Peck! Come on, safe?</p>
<p>It's completely safe! Since when isn't surfing safe?</p>
<p>He's got a point.</p>
<p>Okay, salt lick.</p>
<p>-It's go time! -I'll try it. I'm down.</p>
<p>-Shotgun! -Piggyback!</p>
<p>Never! You are all gonna die.</p>
<p>-Freddy? -Nothing.</p>
<p>Wait a second. Photo op.</p>
<p>Okay, get together!</p>
<p>-Hey, Pig? -What?</p>
<p>-Where'd you get that apple? -This apple?</p>
<p>Oh, well, it originally was attached to this.</p>
<p>Otis?</p>
<p>What? What? What happened?</p>
<p>You know, it's times like this when I really like to say...</p>
<p>Oh, caca!</p>
<p>You didn't do that!</p>
<p>Okay, okay! Look, this is bad enough!</p>
<p>Please, no one scream, &quot;Tree!&quot;</p>
<p>Tree!</p>
<p>Let's surf!</p>
<p>Hang on now, boys! Yeah! Hang hoof!</p>
<p>Otis? Are we supposed to not yell, &quot;Rock&quot;?</p>
<p>We got a gusher!</p>
<p>Chicken farm!</p>
<p>Oh, I get it. We can't yell &quot;Tree&quot; or &quot;Rock&quot;,</p>
<p>but you get to yell, &quot;Chicken farm.&quot;</p>
<p>Morning, everyone.</p>
<p>Okay, before we get started, we have a birthday.</p>
<p>Everett the dog turned 1 3 today.</p>
<p>Boy, those dog years are rough, huh?</p>
<p>Also, remember it's...</p>
<p>Whassup?</p>
<p>Hey, Pop. Look, I know you're probably looking for an explanation regarding</p>
<p>the exploded chicken on me, and the sticky black... The oil stuff.</p>
<p>You are gonna love this! I'll tell you... You the most, because</p>
<p>you, my friend, are a laugher. And every...</p>
<p>-Didn't we all know that? Right? -Just take a seat.</p>
<p>I'll... I'll take a seat.</p>
<p>Cool.</p>
<p>Oh, sorry about that.</p>
<p>Little tight.</p>
<p>As I was saying,</p>
<p>remember tonight at the hoedown, it's free cider night.</p>
<p>Hey. Hey, Pig, I think there's a dead bee in your nostril.</p>
<p>That's not dead.</p>
<p>Okay, the first matter at hand: gray market goods.</p>
<p>As if I needed to say it again.</p>
<p>The purchase of human articles from the gopher underground</p>
<p>is strictly prohibited.</p>
<p>Hello, Moto!</p>
<p>Hey, Otis. Yeah, listen, I think your Nikes are...</p>
<p>Yeah, this really isn't the best time.</p>
<p>Yeah, this really isn't the best time.</p>
<p>Hang on a second. Frankie, come here. Frankie, come here.</p>
<p>No, I'm not... Come here. I'm not gonna hurt you. Frankie, come here.</p>
<p>I told you never to do that again, as long as I live!</p>
<p>Now, put it over there! Now!</p>
<p>Sorry about that. Frankie's out of hand.</p>
<p>Oh, the Nikes. What's the make again?</p>
<p>Yeah. Yeah, I really should go, Mr. Jordan Air.</p>
<p>Wrong number.</p>
<p>Thank you.</p>
<p>Second item.</p>
<p>Lest I remind you, this is coyote season.</p>
<p>That's right.</p>
<p>These are ruthless and desperate creatures.</p>
<p>Rule number one: stay in groups.</p>
<p>Rule number two: stay inside the perimeter of the fence at all times.</p>
<p>And number three: be careful out there.</p>
<p>Okay, let's hit it.</p>
<p>And leaving quickly. Walking out. Walking out. Step, step, step wider...</p>
<p>Otis, why don't you stick around for a minute?</p>
<p>He's scary. Bye.</p>
<p>Okay, Miles. What do you think?</p>
<p>I think you're lucky.</p>
<p>Most cows only have four hooves,</p>
<p>but you're gonna have an extra one right up your...</p>
<p>Okay, that's nice. Dad!</p>
<p>-Sit. -And I'm sitting.</p>
<p>Okay. First off,</p>
<p>I don't even want to know who was on the other end of that phone.</p>
<p>-lt was the gophers, wasn't it? -Well, l...</p>
<p>No, I don't want to know. Was it the gophers?</p>
<p>-Here's... -No, don't. I don't want to know.</p>
<p>Why do you do this to me? How do you think that makes me look?</p>
<p>So this... This is about you?</p>
<p>Where were you this morning, Otis?</p>
<p>I was having a little fun. I mean, you should try it.</p>
<p>It starts with a smile, then slowly builds and...</p>
<p>You promised to help me with the brush around the fence.</p>
<p>You know it's coyote season.</p>
<p>Geez, coyotes. I don't get it. What's the big deal? They're coyotes.</p>
<p>Them tiny, us big! What are they gonna do?</p>
<p>You have a lot to learn.</p>
<p>And you know what, I don't get the fence thing.</p>
<p>Really, it can't keep them out.</p>
<p>That fence defines our space.</p>
<p>And as long as I'm still kicking,</p>
<p>no animal will be harmed inside that fence.</p>
<p>Okay, that's what you do. You.</p>
<p>Okay, if you're trying to groom me to be the big leader,</p>
<p>just give it up. It's not me, Pop.</p>
<p>I mean, if I were in charge, things would be different.</p>
<p>Every animal for himself. That's the way it should be.</p>
<p>Otis.</p>
<p>A strong man stands up for himself.</p>
<p>A stronger man stands up for others.</p>
<p>Oh, shoot. You know, I forgot my pen.</p>
<p>-And your shift tonight? -I'll be there.</p>
<p>Otis, you're gonna have to grow up one day.</p>
<p>You'll never be happy if you spend all your time goofing off.</p>
<p>No? Just watch me.</p>
<p>Manabunga!</p>
<p>Freddy, is this great or what?</p>
<p>Oh, yeah. I could just eat your head right off!</p>
<p>I mean... You know, it's fun up here.</p>
<p>Pip?</p>
<p>I'd go with the wood on this one.</p>
<p>That's what I'm talking about! Sweet mama!</p>
<p>Hey, there's animals over there!</p>
<p>Nice shoes.</p>
<p>Oh, doctor! What a game we have here today!</p>
<p>Yeah!</p>
<p>He got the ball on the 30. He's down on the 20. Lifts it up...</p>
<p>It's a touchdown!</p>
<p>Yeah!</p>
<p>Bacon!</p>
<p>Hamburger!</p>
<p>Chorizo!</p>
<p>-Filet! -What are you doing?</p>
<p>I'm naming the kinds of cuts of meat to the animal I'm jumping on.</p>
<p>Machaca!</p>
<p>Pork chops!</p>
<p>Rump roast!</p>
<p>You know what? You don't need to be doing this.</p>
<p>Oaty-oaty! Oaty-oaty!</p>
<p>Hi, Oaty.</p>
<p>Hey, Maddie. Looking good over there.</p>
<p>Chubba Face, you crazy cow.</p>
<p>Say, &quot;I'm smooshy.&quot;</p>
<p>I am smooshy.</p>
<p>Okay, now you.</p>
<p>Say, &quot;Boy, is it windy.&quot;</p>
<p>Boy, is it windy.</p>
<p>My turn, my turn.</p>
<p>-Okay, chick. Just run along now. -Bye, Oaty.</p>
<p>All righty.</p>
<p>Hey, who is she?</p>
<p>They just showed up. Farmer took them in.</p>
<p>Thank you, Farmer.</p>
<p>Yeah, something happened with their herd.</p>
<p>They're the only two that made it.</p>
<p>She needs a friend.</p>
<p>Wait, wait, wait!</p>
<p>Excuse me, but I couldn't help notice you over there.</p>
<p>Hey! Oh, look at you. You're all...</p>
<p>-Pregnant? -Yeah, sure. I mean...</p>
<p>Really? 'Cause, I mean, it isn't that noticeable, you know.</p>
<p>I mean, especially when you stand straight on,</p>
<p>and you don't look at it.</p>
<p>You know, when you turn to the side, it gets a little lumpy.</p>
<p>I mean glowy. Glowy. It's a glow.</p>
<p>I'm... I'm Otis.</p>
<p>Back off, Daisy. There's an &quot;L&quot; on that boy's forehead.</p>
<p>No, that's just me, the contortion mouse.</p>
<p>C!</p>
<p>X!</p>
<p>N!</p>
<p>-Q! -Oh, man, you're killing me, dude.</p>
<p>Look, I just wanted to welcome you to the barnyard.</p>
<p>I'm sure that you and your...</p>
<p>Not looking. The key word, &quot;not&quot;.</p>
<p>Work with me. Not looking.</p>
<p>This is my friend, Bessy.</p>
<p>Yeah, she's a cupcake.</p>
<p>-lt was nice to meet you, Otis. -Yeah, too you.</p>
<p>You know what? Switch those.</p>
<p>Oh, boy.</p>
<p>There's nothing for you there, but I kind of like her friend.</p>
<p>He's out!</p>
<p>All clear! Sweet!</p>
<p>Now, every heifer, every cow Hold tight to your udders now</p>
<p>Farmer Brown is bedding down Let's turn this barn into funky town</p>
<p>Chickens on the left Dance with your neighbor</p>
<p>Hogs, don't slobber on the pool table</p>
<p>Hogs, don't slobber on the pool table</p>
<p>Try to go easy on the manure It's a dance floor, not a sewer</p>
<p>Here we go, do-si-do Here we go, do-si-do</p>
<p>Put this thing on hot!</p>
<p>Better hold on tight When we go hitting the hay</p>
<p>You better hold on tight and pray</p>
<p>You better hold on tight When we go hitting the hay</p>
<p>Darling, you better run 'Cause I won't hold back them horses</p>
<p>Hitting the hay We'll go hitting the hay</p>
<p>We will rumble and tumble Night and day</p>
<p>Here we go again Come grab your friend</p>
<p>Shake him up, shake him down Try to get a good blend</p>
<p>Here we go, do-si-do Here we go</p>
<p>-First you hold on tight -Hold on tight</p>
<p>- Then you dance all night -Dance all night</p>
<p>Hit the hay!</p>
<p>Better hold on tight When we go hitting the hay</p>
<p>You better hold on tight and pray</p>
<p>You better hold on tight When we go hitting the hay</p>
<p>Hitting the hay We'll go hitting the hay</p>
<p>We will rumble and tumble Night and day</p>
<p>We'll go hitting the hay We'll go hitting the hay</p>
<p>With our backsides shaking We'll go hitting the hay</p>
<p>Wow! This is amazing.</p>
<p>What you looking at?</p>
<p>What? You want some of this?</p>
<p>Oh, yeah, I didn't think so.</p>
<p>Sit right here, honey.</p>
<p>The flowers are beautiful.</p>
<p>See? On time, just like l...</p>
<p>Right.</p>
<p>Cramp! That's a cramp!</p>
<p>Oh, it's cramping!</p>
<p>And release.</p>
<p>-Hello, Son. -Dad,</p>
<p>I've been thinking,</p>
<p>and I'm willing to accept your apology.</p>
<p>-Really? -Sure. I mean, it's only right. I mean...</p>
<p>Okay.</p>
<p>I don't mean to let you down, Pop. I'm just out trying to have some fun.</p>
<p>It's a beautiful night.</p>
<p>I remember when I used to sit out here with your sister.</p>
<p>-I don't have a sister. -Oh, yeah.</p>
<p>That was you, wasn't it?</p>
<p>Thank you, all right.</p>
<p>So, are we okay?</p>
<p>-We're okay. -Great.</p>
<p>See, 'cause I wanted to ask you something.</p>
<p>My friends are all going to the barn tonight,</p>
<p>and not that it matters either way to me,</p>
<p>but evidently, I'm needed.</p>
<p>I'm a sort of an integral part of a musical number.</p>
<p>Yeah, I tried to tell them no, you know? But they were just so...</p>
<p>I told them, &quot;My dad's not gonna wanna cover my shift.</p>
<p>&quot;l mean, it's my shift, not his. It isn't his!&quot; You know?</p>
<p>&quot;l don't want to be selfish. What's mine is mine, and...&quot;</p>
<p>What do you think?</p>
<p>Otis...</p>
<p>I never thought I was gonna amount to much.</p>
<p>I certainly didn't think I'd be in charge of anything.</p>
<p>But that all changed one day.</p>
<p>It was the day you showed up.</p>
<p>I head out into the meadow</p>
<p>and I see this little baby calf all alone,</p>
<p>stumbling around.</p>
<p>You know, before you became a nightmare.</p>
<p>Well, I took you home that night,</p>
<p>and I know it doesn't sound possible,</p>
<p>but I looked up into the sky</p>
<p>and I would have swore</p>
<p>I saw the stars dance.</p>
<p>At that moment, I knew my place was here,</p>
<p>taking care of things.</p>
<p>I guess you helped me realize that.</p>
<p>I love you, Son.</p>
<p>-You still want to go, don't you? -Yeah, I really do.</p>
<p>Not that your stuff... You know, the stuff you're saying isn't nifty and everything...</p>
<p>No one says &quot;nifty&quot;.</p>
<p>I say &quot;nifty.&quot; I do, and sometimes even &quot;swifty.&quot; I'll say that.</p>
<p>Very impressive.</p>
<p>Go ahead, have fun. I'll cover your shift.</p>
<p>Thanks, Pop. You're the best.</p>
<p>-Otis? -Yeah?</p>
<p>Be the stronger man.</p>
<p>Yeah. Yeah, that's that saying thing, right?</p>
<p>&quot;A strong man stands up for himself.</p>
<p>&quot;A stronger man can bridge the gap between...&quot;</p>
<p>Got it locked in the vault.</p>
<p>See? I learn.</p>
<p>Mr. Boombastic</p>
<p>What you want is a boombastic Romantic, fantastic lover</p>
<p>She call me Mr. Boombastic Say me fantastic</p>
<p>Touch me in me back She says I'm Mr. Romantic</p>
<p>Call me fantastic</p>
<p>Touch me in me back She says I'm Mr. Ro...</p>
<p>Smooth</p>
<p>Who's here? Moo! It's me! Moo!</p>
<p>Whassup? Milk me!</p>
<p>Hey, babe.</p>
<p>My barn. That's right, my barn.</p>
<p>You're late. Come on.</p>
<p>He's a real winner, that one.</p>
<p>Oh, stop. I think he's kind of cute.</p>
<p>Lay down in my Jacuzzi and get some bubble bath</p>
<p>Only sound you will hear is the beating of my heart</p>
<p>And we will mmm-mmm And have some sweet pillow talk</p>
<p>I'm Boombastic, really fantastic Mr. Boom Boom Boom Boom</p>
<p>Give it up for the one and only, Biggy Cheese!</p>
<p>We're gonna have some fun tonight, y'all.</p>
<p>Hey, Buck. Get your hooves off the stage.</p>
<p>You ain't in show business.</p>
<p>What, were you raised in a barn?</p>
<p>Well, you're a good horse. Okay...</p>
<p>What you looking at, Turkey?</p>
<p>Somebody pass me the cranberry sauce.</p>
<p>Dead turkey walking.</p>
<p>We all gonna die, but we don't know the date.</p>
<p>We know your date, Thanksgiving!</p>
<p>Okay, to kick things off tonight, I got a special treat.</p>
<p>Back by popular demand.</p>
<p>Ladies, this one's for you.</p>
<p>Our own Otis and the Crew!</p>
<p>Well, down on the farm</p>
<p>Where they all ask for you</p>
<p>Parties all hours of the night.</p>
<p>What is that farmer up to? You know what?</p>
<p>-I'm gonna call someone. -Oh, leave him be.</p>
<p>Well, I'll just call whoever I want, whenever I want to.</p>
<p>That's exactly what I'll do.</p>
<p>Because I know what a rave is, Mr. Lump.</p>
<p>&quot;I'm going to sit and watch TV and be a lump.&quot;</p>
<p>Okay, Mr. Lumpy. It's just not right.</p>
<p>They all ask for you</p>
<p>They all ask for you</p>
<p>Down on the farm</p>
<p>They all ask for you</p>
<p>I'll check it.</p>
<p>It's all right. Calm down. It's just the pizza guy.</p>
<p>I'm on it.</p>
<p>Watch out. I got it. I got it.</p>
<p>Pizza, pizza, pizza.</p>
<p>Thanks. You want change?</p>
<p>No, keep it.</p>
<p>So, you really ordered a lot of pizzas.</p>
<p>Well, yes. We're having a big human party.</p>
<p>Just a party. A big one.</p>
<p>With us celebrating our humanness.</p>
<p>-Dude, I love parties! Can l... -No.</p>
<p>Okay. Well, then, I'll see you.</p>
<p>Ouch!</p>
<p>My arm fell off.</p>
<p>My fake arm, I mean.</p>
<p>Wow, I am so sorry about that.</p>
<p>-Do you need any help? -No, I don't like help.</p>
<p>It's just against my religion. I'm a Nohelpian.</p>
<p>Cool, I'm a Lutheran.</p>
<p>What about this?</p>
<p>You know what? You keep it. It's dirty now.</p>
<p>Really? All right.</p>
<p>Dude, I got a arm!</p>
<p>Yeah! Righteous!</p>
<p>Well, I won't back down</p>
<p>No, I won't back down</p>
<p>You can stand me up at the gates of hell</p>
<p>But I won't back down</p>
<p>Gonna stand my ground</p>
<p>Won't be turned around</p>
<p>And I'll keep this world from dragging me down</p>
<p>Gonna stand my ground</p>
<p>Good evening, ladies.</p>
<p>Sorry to call on you so late in the evening,</p>
<p>but we did have a previous engagement.</p>
<p>Now, we're gonna take six of you.</p>
<p>Anyone makes a sound, we don't mind the extra company.</p>
<p>Boys, take your pick.</p>
<p>You won't be taking any hens tonight.</p>
<p>And you're gonna stop us?</p>
<p>Is that what's gonna happen? Are you gonna stop us, hen?</p>
<p>How are you gonna do that?</p>
<p>No, he is.</p>
<p>Ben. How are you, Ben?</p>
<p>We would've said hello, had we seen you.</p>
<p>Put the hen down, Dag.</p>
<p>Sure, Ben. Whatever you say.</p>
<p>We're just doing a little courting, that's all.</p>
<p>You know how much we like the hens.</p>
<p>You know me, ladykiller.</p>
<p>You have us at a bit of a disadvantage here, Ben.</p>
<p>There's six of us,</p>
<p>and only one old, fat you.</p>
<p>Oh, baby! Party time!</p>
<p>Otis!</p>
<p>Otis!</p>
<p>Otis! Otis!</p>
<p>It's Ben.</p>
<p>Oh, no. No, no.</p>
<p>Yeah. You hang on there, buddy.</p>
<p>All right now, Otis. Just lift.</p>
<p>Ten and two. Ten and two.</p>
<p>Not like that. Now lift, and two.</p>
<p>You dog!</p>
<p>Come here, fisherman.</p>
<p>What do we do now? Who's gonna protect us from the coyotes?</p>
<p>Anybody got a pistol?</p>
<p>Order, here! Hey, am I bothering you?</p>
<p>Let's get this meeting started.</p>
<p>-Duke, who's gonna run the meeting? -That's what the meeting's about.</p>
<p>The meeting's about finding someone to run the meeting?</p>
<p>Is that a good idea?</p>
<p>We should take a meeting about it.</p>
<p>Someone has to do this. We don't have Ben.</p>
<p>Therefore, I would like to nominate myself.</p>
<p>Dogs are... Listen to me.</p>
<p>Dogs are watchful, they're loyal, and very protective.</p>
<p>And they lick themselves.</p>
<p>I don't want a leader who licks himself.</p>
<p>-Me, neither. -That's nasty.</p>
<p>I can't even reach mine.</p>
<p>I don't do that.</p>
<p>Anymore.</p>
<p>One time, I was bored, lonely, and a little snackish.</p>
<p>Yeah, I saw you drink out of a toilet once.</p>
<p>-Hey, you drink potty water. -You drink potty water!</p>
<p>My bowl was empty, my friend. Come on, we're getting off track here.</p>
<p>Duke, with all respect, I think there are certain traits</p>
<p>that would make you unqualified to be leader.</p>
<p>Yeah, such as?</p>
<p>Your point?</p>
<p>Hey, come on, I do that for fun,</p>
<p>not 'cause I have to. Go on!</p>
<p>So, big deal. I fetch balls. One little flaw.</p>
<p>This doesn't mean anything.</p>
<p>All right, all right, let's take a vote. Come on, let's take a vote here.</p>
<p>All those in favor of me being the new leader.</p>
<p>Those opposed?</p>
<p>-Can you see my hand? -Listen now, listen up.</p>
<p>You all know that Ben always intended for Otis to take his place.</p>
<p>All right, Otis is in charge.</p>
<p>I second that motion. Sweet!</p>
<p>Here we go.</p>
<p>Try and catch me.</p>
<p>Stay in line.</p>
<p>Maddie, we don't want to lose you.</p>
<p>Oh, I think that would be just fine.</p>
<p>Oaty-oaty! Hey, Oaty!</p>
<p>Hey, Maddie, now really isn't a good...</p>
<p>What are you doing? Would you stop? Come on.</p>
<p>Hey, hey, hey, guys, guys...</p>
<p>-Oh, goodness gracious. -What is it? What is it?</p>
<p>Otis, it's a madhouse! Isn't it just great?</p>
<p>You got hit with a soccer ball.</p>
<p>I thought I'd be the first to congratulate you, Otis.</p>
<p>-You're in charge now. -I'm what?</p>
<p>Miles, I am not in charge, okay?</p>
<p>I don't do &quot;ln charge&quot;.</p>
<p>-This is not my responsibility. -I hear you.</p>
<p>But you were elected fair and square.</p>
<p>Congratulations, boss.</p>
<p>Hey!</p>
<p>Have you all lost your mind?</p>
<p>It's daylight. The Farmer's gonna be back.</p>
<p>This is so off limits.</p>
<p>Come on, Otis,</p>
<p>I know your weak spot.</p>
<p>Wild Mike!</p>
<p>-What? -Wild Mike.</p>
<p>Wild Mike. Wild Mike.</p>
<p>-Wild Mike. -I'm not doing this, okay?</p>
<p>-There's no way this is happening. -Wild Mike. Wild Mike.</p>
<p>-Everybody just get back to your... -Wild Mike. Wild Mike.</p>
<p>-Return to your designated quadrants. -Wild Mike. Wild Mike.</p>
<p>Wild Mike! Wild Mike!</p>
<p>-This is ridiculous! -Wild Mike!</p>
<p>I'm not gonna dance just because you're getting Wild Mike.</p>
<p>-Pip, help me out here. -Wild Mike. Wild Mike.</p>
<p>You can't fight it, Otis. You're a born party animal.</p>
<p>Wild Mike! Wild Mike! Wild Mike!</p>
<p>Wild Mike! Wild Mike! Wild Mike!</p>
<p>Let's boogie!</p>
<p>We're heading for the West Not heading for the East</p>
<p>We're gonna live our dream 'Cause we're wild and free</p>
<p>Look at that freaky thing.</p>
<p>What kind of animal is that?</p>
<p>I don't know, but he sure can dance.</p>
<p>I say, let's kill it. Give me that piece of wood over there.</p>
<p>Sweet legs! Get the sweet legs! I got the sweet legs!</p>
<p>Moo?</p>
<p>What did you do that for?</p>
<p>What else was I gonna do? He saw you.</p>
<p>You could have killed him!</p>
<p>I got a pulse.</p>
<p>Oh, this is bad. This is bad. This is so bad.</p>
<p>Baaad.</p>
<p>Everybody, just calm down. Just calm down, all right?</p>
<p>What are we gonna do? What are we gonna do?</p>
<p>What?</p>
<p>Come on. You're our leader. Lead us.</p>
<p>That does not apply to this.</p>
<p>This is a totally, situationally different suspect.</p>
<p>Hey, whoa, no.</p>
<p>-We gotta ditch the body. -Stop it!</p>
<p>He knows too much. We gotta take care of him.</p>
<p>-We gotta whack him. -There will be no whacking, okay?</p>
<p>The Farmer's a good guy. He's been good to us.</p>
<p>He's a vegan, God bless him.</p>
<p>And what is a vegan, again?</p>
<p>I know this one.</p>
<p>No, I got it. It means you can't eat anything with a face.</p>
<p>No, no, no, that's a vegetarian.</p>
<p>Vegetarians have to eat in the dark, right?</p>
<p>That's a vampire. Come on.</p>
<p>You can't eat cheese?</p>
<p>It's not just cheese. Vegans can't have any dairy products.</p>
<p>-Cake? -Cake has egg products.</p>
<p>But you can't have any dairy.</p>
<p>No dairy? I love dairy. Does that mean I can't be a vegan?</p>
<p>I love the smell of bacon. There, I said it.</p>
<p>Would you not do that?</p>
<p>It's not like we have a lot of options.</p>
<p>Boy, that's a doozy. That thing's bigger than me.</p>
<p>Push it.</p>
<p>-He wakes up, you got my back, right? -Yeah.</p>
<p>Come on. Come on.</p>
<p>Okay, watch this. Off his nose, on the belly, on the floor. Check it.</p>
<p>Book.</p>
<p>Okay, now. He was sitting here, he was reading.</p>
<p>-Something fell on his head, and... -I got it.</p>
<p>Too light. Couldn't cause a bump like that.</p>
<p>I bet it could.</p>
<p>Would you cut it out? We need something bigger.</p>
<p>Can I have the apple?</p>
<p>What's with the look?</p>
<p>He's buying it.</p>
<p>He's not buying it.</p>
<p>He's buying it.</p>
<p>He's not buying it.</p>
<p>No, he's buying it.</p>
<p>Will you stop doing that?</p>
<p>Well, unless you get him a blindfold, I'm going to kick him!</p>
<p>Okay, let's go.</p>
<p>There. See? Good as new.</p>
<p>I'll tell you, this being in charge thing isn't so tough.</p>
<p>You know what I'm talking about? You know what I'm talking about. Yeah.</p>
<p>Yeah, hi. Hey, there. Having a good day? Yeah.</p>
<p>So, this was Otis's idea?</p>
<p>Oh, yeah. We're like the second line of defense.</p>
<p>We see or hear anything suspicious, and I just signal Otis with a crow.</p>
<p>And I've really been working on it. Listen.</p>
<p>Well, you know, in the moment, it'll be really strong.</p>
<p>But for now, we just stand watch.</p>
<p>Yeah, watch.</p>
<p>Come and get it!</p>
<p>Freddy, you okay?</p>
<p>Boneless white meat! What? I'm not hungry!</p>
<p>I mean, I don't wanna eat anyone... Thing... You...</p>
<p>What happened? What? What? What?</p>
<p>Okay, quick little once around the barnyard, then, hello, party!</p>
<p>Hey, look at this. It's our new inside connection.</p>
<p>Congrats, Otis.</p>
<p>Oh, will you look at that?</p>
<p>Don't wake up the cow.</p>
<p>That's called cowtipping.</p>
<p>Oh, that so steams me!</p>
<p>Man, I wish I could get a hold of that little... I would...</p>
<p>Hey, I'm in charge, right?</p>
<p>Oh, we are so talking. Are we not talking?</p>
<p>-Talking the talk and walking the walk. -Walkie-talkie, huh?</p>
<p>Let's go.</p>
<p>Then I said, &quot;That's called cowtipping.&quot;</p>
<p>I hear music over there again. Do you hear music?</p>
<p>That farmer's out of control.</p>
<p>We should call someone. We should call someone.</p>
<p>-I smell buttermilk. -Shut up! Shut up!</p>
<p>-What's that smell? -Stop it! Stop it!</p>
<p>Randall, there is a cow outside.</p>
<p>This is a cow farm. You're gonna find cows outside.</p>
<p>No, I mean right outside.</p>
<p>Right outside this house, looming like a ghost. Like a reaper.</p>
<p>No, cows don't like houses much.</p>
<p>They prefer it out in the meadow, where they can get a graze on.</p>
<p>Nathan Randall the Third, I am not crazy.</p>
<p>I am medicated for a chemical imbalance.</p>
<p>Don't you sit there and think that I am crazy.</p>
<p>Your mind's gone, woman.</p>
<p>Where'd it go? I don't know.</p>
<p>It's gone.</p>
<p>-Oh geez, you're on my foot again. -Sorry.</p>
<p>This is so sweet. This is so wicked sweet.</p>
<p>I love the new you, Otis.</p>
<p>Okay, lgg, you remember how to do this?</p>
<p>-Oh, he remembers. -I remember.</p>
<p>-Yeah, he remembers. -He's remembering.</p>
<p>Right now.</p>
<p>Well, pinch me, I'm dreaming. Here is a first.</p>
<p>Otis joining us on a joyride.</p>
<p>-That's the animal sin of sins, huh? -&quot;Sin of sins,&quot; I like that.</p>
<p>Hey, old Bud. Bud, you bring the stuff?</p>
<p>It's right here.</p>
<p>-Show it. Show it. -It's right here.</p>
<p>-Show it. -It's right here.</p>
<p>-Show it. -It's right there.</p>
<p>We're rebels! We're rebels!</p>
<p>We're the wildest!</p>
<p>There they are.</p>
<p>-Too bad we can't go in there. -Yeah.</p>
<p>Breaks my heart.</p>
<p>Now remember, honey, I told you,</p>
<p>we can't be staying out this late on a school night.</p>
<p>&quot;We can't be staying out late.&quot;</p>
<p>Whatever. I'll do what I want.</p>
<p>Do what I want, when I want, 'cause I want to do it.</p>
<p>You've come to the wrong place.</p>
<p>-What is that? -I'm lactose intolerant.</p>
<p>-Oh, man. -Here we go. I know.</p>
<p>-One, two... -Yeah.</p>
<p>Two, yeah.</p>
<p>Moo!</p>
<p>That's called boytipping!</p>
<p>-Let's get out of here! -Come on, move it!</p>
<p>Let me out!</p>
<p>Okay, go!</p>
<p>Never go to meadows. Never go to meadows.</p>
<p>Never go to meadows. Never go to meadows.</p>
<p>Treat cows nicely.</p>
<p>Okay, no more Red Bull.</p>
<p>Put crowns on our heads, 'cause we are the kings!</p>
<p>Did you see his face?</p>
<p>-Price... -Less.</p>
<p>-Price... -Less.</p>
<p>-Pr... -lce...</p>
<p>Less.</p>
<p>A toast! To a new world order.</p>
<p>We are calling the shots now!</p>
<p>-Yeah, it's all about us now. -You've got that right, Otis.</p>
<p>Nothing can touch us.</p>
<p>Oh, man! Oh, man!</p>
<p>-Oh, man! -Man, oh, man!</p>
<p>Let me out! You gotta let me out!</p>
<p>Pull over to the side of the road.</p>
<p>Oh, no, they're talking to us now.</p>
<p>Pull over! You gotta pull over!</p>
<p>We can't pull over!</p>
<p>Hang on!</p>
<p>What could be worse than this?</p>
<p>What we got here is probably some teenagers</p>
<p>going out for a joyride in their mom's car.</p>
<p>Yeah, we'll shake them up a bit, send them home. You know kids.</p>
<p>Nothing a little strip search won't cure, yeah.</p>
<p>Is this thing still on?</p>
<p>Is that a camera?</p>
<p>-This is it. Goodbye. -They're taping Cops.</p>
<p>Mommy! Mooo-mmy!</p>
<p>Hey, relax. We can lose them. I mean, it's just a car, right?</p>
<p>It's a chopper! It's a chopper!</p>
<p>We're gonna die!</p>
<p>We interrupt this program with a breaking news story. Police are in...</p>
<p>Would you look at that? The world is going crazy.</p>
<p>These kids get all hopped up on Diet Coke and Jolly Ranchers and just...</p>
<p>That's our car!</p>
<p>That was a hoof. There's a cow in our car! That is a hoof!</p>
<p>Yes, this is Nora Beady.</p>
<p>What do you mean, &quot;What now?&quot;</p>
<p>My car is on TV, and I think there's a cow in it.</p>
<p>And I saw a cow outside my window. I think they may be linked.</p>
<p>Don't think I can't call again, Gary.</p>
<p>Oh, that's nice. Good.</p>
<p>They're gonna catch us and they're gonna dissect us.</p>
<p>We are ditching out!</p>
<p>Two all-beef patties, that's our future!</p>
<p>Out! Run!</p>
<p>-Run! -Stop touching me!</p>
<p>They're making a run for it. Let's go. Come on.</p>
<p>This is Gray Badger in Chopper 219. We've got suspects in sight.</p>
<p>I'm chafing!</p>
<p>Okay. Hurry up, fellows. They're right over there.</p>
<p>Oh, milk me!</p>
<p>Okay, here we go! Here we go!</p>
<p>Milk me!</p>
<p>Geez, these guys are big.</p>
<p>I see them over there.</p>
<p>Cut it right!</p>
<p>We got them!</p>
<p>Could you guys believe that? Did you guys see me?</p>
<p>Me, I am fearless, baby.</p>
<p>-Oh, yeah, fear... -Less.</p>
<p>I think I rolled over my foot.</p>
<p>We left it the same way we found it.</p>
<p>Okay, toodle-oo, Otis. Same time tomorrow night?</p>
<p>Hey, guys, can you imagine Ben doing something like that?</p>
<p>-No way. No way. -We'd be in trouble.</p>
<p>-Trou... -Ble.</p>
<p>Okay, explain to me exactly why are we doing this?</p>
<p>Because it's what my dad would do.</p>
<p>Why don't you just go have fun, all right? I can do this.</p>
<p>No way. We're homeboys. I'm here with you.</p>
<p>Really, it's all right.</p>
<p>Okay, I tried! Later, dude.</p>
<p>I'll bring you back a drink or something. Be back.</p>
<p>Come on back, I'm right here.</p>
<p>Mind if I join you?</p>
<p>No. I mean, sure. I no mind you...</p>
<p>Geez, I can't even talk to you!</p>
<p>Hang on a second.</p>
<p>Here. You know, just let me...</p>
<p>No, I can still sit on my own, I think.</p>
<p>Oh, my gosh! Oh, my gosh, the baby's coming!</p>
<p>What?</p>
<p>I made you jump.</p>
<p>Nice. Nice. Thank you. I about swallowed my cud.</p>
<p>-It's beautiful, isn't it? -My cud?</p>
<p>-The night. -Yeah, that, too. Yeah, it's nice.</p>
<p>My dad had a thing about stars.</p>
<p>-Tell me, what was he like? -My pop?</p>
<p>He was amazing. Bigger than life, you know?</p>
<p>Funny, we're not even related.</p>
<p>He found me and he took me in.</p>
<p>I never thought about it before, but everything he did was for me.</p>
<p>He's the only family I've ever known.</p>
<p>The last time we talked, he told me that the night he found me</p>
<p>he looked up into the sky and he said that the stars...</p>
<p>God, I miss him.</p>
<p>What about you? I mean, if that's too personal, you know.</p>
<p>If I'm overstepping like a boundary or...</p>
<p>You know what? Too bad. Cough it up.</p>
<p>Okay.</p>
<p>Well, where do I start?</p>
<p>I was married, and life was good.</p>
<p>Yeah. It seems like forever ago now, but...</p>
<p>One day, a bad storm rolled in.</p>
<p>Bessy and I were in the meadow and we found a place on high ground.</p>
<p>But when we went home,</p>
<p>well, everyone was gone.</p>
<p>You know what I think?</p>
<p>I think some good things are gonna start happening to you and me.</p>
<p>What, do you wanna be a hero, cow?</p>
<p>Hey, you're Ben's kid.</p>
<p>Otis, right?</p>
<p>So they left you in charge?</p>
<p>Oh, that's precious.</p>
<p>You thought you could fill his shoes?</p>
<p>Otis, where were you?</p>
<p>Were you off having fun? Laughing with your barnyard buddies?</p>
<p>Yeah, you could have made a difference had you been there for him,</p>
<p>but you weren't. Were you?</p>
<p>Okay, from here on out, this is the way it's gonna work.</p>
<p>We show up, you look the other way.</p>
<p>A few animals missing here and there.</p>
<p>Hey, it's the natural order of things.</p>
<p>It'll be our little secret.</p>
<p>Oh, and Ben's kid,</p>
<p>if you should think about getting a sudden burst of courage,</p>
<p>we slaughter every animal in sight.</p>
<p>Now, you go back, make everyone feel all safe,</p>
<p>and we'll be seeing you tomorrow night. That's a date.</p>
<p>See you around.</p>
<p>&quot;Round.&quot; You're fat.</p>
<p>Hey, Pop.</p>
<p>I wanted to come by and...</p>
<p>Look, you were just a great dad.</p>
<p>You see, l...</p>
<p>I don't know what I was thinking, but, for a minute, I actually thought</p>
<p>I could take your place.</p>
<p>But those coyotes?</p>
<p>I mean, you'd have stood up to them and you wouldn't have backed down.</p>
<p>I gotta tell you, I was so afraid.</p>
<p>You know, I know I always said that I wasn't you, and I'm not.</p>
<p>But I wish I was.</p>
<p>I can't do it, Pop.</p>
<p>I gotta go.</p>
<p>I'm sorry.</p>
<p>And Duke will handle things, and everything will be fine.</p>
<p>Wait. What are you talking about?</p>
<p>Could you just not say anything?</p>
<p>Okay, I don't want to make a big thing about this.</p>
<p>Hey, everybody! Otis is leaving the barnyard!</p>
<p>-What's going on? -I don't believe it.</p>
<p>Oat, seriously,</p>
<p>I mean, you and me, we're like best friends.</p>
<p>No, Pip. It's over!</p>
<p>I'm leaving, all right? No big whoop. Continue your day.</p>
<p>Come on, Otis, we'll do what you say.</p>
<p>That's the point. I don't want you to do what I say.</p>
<p>I don't want any of you to have to listen to me.</p>
<p>Don't listen to him!</p>
<p>Stop doing what I say!</p>
<p>Okay, so what you're saying is, you'll stay if we don't do what you say.</p>
<p>Dead bee.</p>
<p>Thanks.</p>
<p>Again, alive.</p>
<p>Duke, you're in charge. Get the dogs together.</p>
<p>You guys can handle things better than I ever could.</p>
<p>Sure, Otis. If you say.</p>
<p>I've got my own life to lead, all right? I don't belong here anymore.</p>
<p>-Hi. -Hey.</p>
<p>What happened, Otis? Oh, please don't say, &quot;Nothing.&quot;</p>
<p>Look, it's complicated.</p>
<p>If you're hurting, let me help. I'd like to help.</p>
<p>You know what happened? I froze. Okay?</p>
<p>Last night, I didn't run the coyotes off. I couldn't do anything.</p>
<p>They're gonna come back tonight, and I can't protect anyone.</p>
<p>Everyone here, they all trust me. And I can't protect a single one of them.</p>
<p>Otis, the best leader isn't the biggest or the strongest.</p>
<p>The best leader is the one who cares the most.</p>
<p>Yeah, that's a nice thought, Daisy. That's a really nice thought.</p>
<p>I'll tell you one thing. I am really going to miss Bessy.</p>
<p>Okay. If this is what you have to do, I understand.</p>
<p>But I just want you to know one thing.</p>
<p>Even if you do leave, I believe in you.</p>
<p>Otis! Otis!</p>
<p>All right, Peck, take it easy. What's the matter?</p>
<p>They took... We got to... Come on!</p>
<p>I found him, guys!</p>
<p>Otis, the coyotes. It just happened.</p>
<p>They took Etta, Hanna, maybe six, seven others, I don't know.</p>
<p>They've never come during the day before.</p>
<p>They knew I wouldn't be expecting them until tonight.</p>
<p>They played me.</p>
<p>-What? -Nothing.</p>
<p>Otis, they took Maddie.</p>
<p>Those coyotes are strong.</p>
<p>What?</p>
<p>The coyotes, they're strong.</p>
<p>I was just wondering what a stronger man might do.</p>
<p>-You'll look after things? -Be proud to.</p>
<p>I'll be back.</p>
<p>-I'm going, too. -No, Pip, stay here.</p>
<p>You can't do this alone. They could kill you.</p>
<p>Yeah, I guess they could.</p>
<p>It's nice that you ladies could join us this evening.</p>
<p>Thank you for being so patient. We prefer dining at night.</p>
<p>You're a wonderful species.</p>
<p>I love chicken. My favorite part is the skin.</p>
<p>You're a big meanie.</p>
<p>-What? -You're a meaner.</p>
<p>Meaner, meaner. Meaners got to eat, too.</p>
<p>Leave her alone.</p>
<p>This one's mine.</p>
<p>Cook her while I have the little one for an appetizer.</p>
<p>You know, because I'm a meaner.</p>
<p>Put the chick down, Dag.</p>
<p>-Otis! -Oaty!</p>
<p>We suddenly got a burst of courage, did we?</p>
<p>Okay. All right.</p>
<p>Well, first, what I'm gonna do is I'm gonna take that chick from you.</p>
<p>Then, while you're picking yourself up off the ground,</p>
<p>I'm gonna gather up the hens and I'm gonna leave.</p>
<p>And exactly how do you propose you're going to do that?</p>
<p>Kill him!</p>
<p>Well, I know what's right</p>
<p>I got just one life</p>
<p>In a world that keeps on pushing me around</p>
<p>But I'll stand my ground</p>
<p>And I won't back down</p>
<p>Hey, baby</p>
<p>There ain't no easy way out</p>
<p>Hey</p>
<p>I will stand my ground</p>
<p>And I won't back down</p>
<p>Oh, you like that, yeah?</p>
<p>That should do. That should do.</p>
<p>Well, look at the hero.</p>
<p>You thought you could come into my den?</p>
<p>Now, why don't you lay there and watch</p>
<p>while we eat your friends?</p>
<p>What's this?</p>
<p>A strong man stands up for himself.</p>
<p>A stronger man stands up for others.</p>
<p>This should be fun.</p>
<p>I smell fear.</p>
<p>Shoot! I told you they can smell it!</p>
<p>They can smell it?</p>
<p>Oh, yeah, I have it. I have a lot of it.</p>
<p>Just stick near me, guys, and you'll be all right.</p>
<p>Yeah, I'll watch your juicy back.</p>
<p>I mean, your regular back.</p>
<p>-Hey! -Sorry, man.</p>
<p>They're just pellets. I'm nervous.</p>
<p>That's your army?</p>
<p>Something tells me you may want to take a couple steps back.</p>
<p>Here we come!</p>
<p>-Here comes trou... -Ble!</p>
<p>-Trou... -Ble!</p>
<p>-Trou... -Ble!</p>
<p>Pip, talk me into it. Talk me into it.</p>
<p>Flip the lid a little bit. You're mad! You're a pig!</p>
<p>-You're mad! -Let's do this!</p>
<p>You know what I'm gonna do? I'm gonna go right in your ear!</p>
<p>There's a mouse in my ear! There's a mouse in my ear!</p>
<p>Oh, yeah. Step on it, baby!</p>
<p>All right, come on. Give me your best shot.</p>
<p>Oh, sorry. Here. You know what? Let me give you a hand.</p>
<p>Yeah, give him the puncher! Smack him!</p>
<p>Well, well, whatever will I do?</p>
<p>Oh, don't worry, I got something special for you.</p>
<p>I just love that little guy.</p>
<p>Come on, hurry.</p>
<p>-No! -Hi!</p>
<p>It tastes like chicken!</p>
<p>Chicken!</p>
<p>Chick, chick, chickity-chick, chicken!</p>
<p>Come here, you furry, four-legged chickens!</p>
<p>Take it easy, man.</p>
<p>Come on, what you got going? There's nothing there.</p>
<p>Hey, Otis, look out!</p>
<p>-Behind you! -Watch out!</p>
<p>Watch out!</p>
<p>Look behind you.</p>
<p>Remember me?</p>
<p>I'm Ben's kid.</p>
<p>Never come back!</p>
<p>-Pip? -I'd have to go with the iron, man.</p>
<p>Then I said I was gonna hit him with a stick.</p>
<p>We know. We know. I heard you say that.</p>
<p>Quite a night, huh?</p>
<p>We took down the coyotes, Peck learned to crow,</p>
<p>and by the time we get back,</p>
<p>we'll have a new member of the barnyard running around.</p>
<p>Daisy. She like went into labor after you left.</p>
<p>-Daisy's... -She's having her baby, dude.</p>
<p>What you think was gonna happen?</p>
<p>She would just keep getting bigger or something?</p>
<p>-ls she all right? We've gotta get back. -Yeah.</p>
<p>Doubtful we'll make it back in time walking.</p>
<p>I'm sure she's gonna be all right, Otis.</p>
<p>Miles, I've got to be there.</p>
<p>Please remember, mister, that I am a lady.</p>
<p>When you are with me, your eyes are on me, not her.</p>
<p>We can call and tell them where to pick them up.</p>
<p>Car!</p>
<p>Righteous!</p>
<p>Duke, what's happening?</p>
<p>Otis, come on. You know, I think... I'm pretty sure... Yeah, it's time.</p>
<p>Boy.</p>
<p>Otis, I was so worried.</p>
<p>Worried about what? I so had that covered.</p>
<p>It's okay, I'm here.</p>
<p>And I'm here for you, too.</p>
<p>Okay, girl, you're doing fine. Now, just breathe.</p>
<p>Man, that looks like it hurts.</p>
<p>Oh, that's very profound, lnsight-Man.</p>
<p>Well, excuse me for being a pig.</p>
<p>How come nothing's happened yet?</p>
<p>She's gonna be all right, though, huh?</p>
<p>Yeah, like, like... What if it gets stuck or something?</p>
<p>What? You mean like stuck halfway, so she'd be a cow and a half?</p>
<p>I didn't say &quot;cow and a half.&quot;</p>
<p>Yes, you did. You just did.</p>
<p>-Hey, Duke, did I say &quot;Cow and a half&quot;? -I'm not doing this.</p>
<p>No, look.</p>
<p>It's a beautiful little boy.</p>
<p>Go ahead.</p>
<p>He's perfect.</p>
<p>What are you gonna name him?</p>
<p>I was thinking I kind of like</p>
<p>Ben.</p>
<p>Oh, I think that's just great.</p>
<p>Hey, there, little Ben.</p>
<p>Hey, there, little buddy. Look at you.</p>
<p>Look at my little buddy.</p>
<p>Here you go.</p>
<p>Hey, Otis, we were all talking,</p>
<p>and we know you may have other plans, we understand that,</p>
<p>but we really, really appreciate what you did around here.</p>
<p>And, well, we were wondering, I don't know,</p>
<p>if maybe you planned on staying around a little longer?</p>
<p>Freedom is a song</p>
<p>Freedom is a spirit</p>
<p>To take another's hand</p>
<p>I'll just say this,</p>
<p>as long as I'm still kicking,</p>
<p>no animal will be harmed inside that fence.</p>
<p>High paw!</p>
<p>Hey, all right.</p>
<p>Freedom is a song</p>
<p>Freedom is a spirit</p>
<p>For people who are strong</p>
<p>Freedom is a spirit</p>
<p>Freedom is a land</p>
<p>Freedom is the courage</p>
<p>To take another's hand</p>
<p>I, Nora Beady, am a precious object</p>
<p>and shall treat myself as such.</p>
<p>Gosh, I wonder why... I forgot to use conditioner or...</p>
<p>-We gotta ditch the body. -Stop it!</p>
<p>He knows too much. We gotta take care of him.</p>
<p>-We gotta whack him. -There will be no whacking, okay?</p>
<p>The Farmer's a good guy. He's been good to us.</p>
<p>He's a vegan, God bless him.</p>
<p>And what is a vegan, again?</p>
<p>I know this one.</p>
<p>No, I got it. It means you can't eat anything with a face.</p>
<p>No, no, no, that's a vegetarian.</p>
<p>Vegetarians have to eat in the dark, right?</p>
<p>That's a vampire. Come on.</p>
<p>You can't eat cheese?</p>
<p>It's not just cheese. Vegans can't have any dairy products.</p>
<p>-Cake? -Cake has egg products.</p>
<p>But you can't have any dairy.</p>
<p>No dairy? I love dairy. Does that mean I can't be a vegan?</p>
<p>I love the smell of bacon. There, I said it.</p>
<p>Would you not do that?</p>
<p>It's not like we have a lot of options.</p>
<p>Boy, that's a doozy. That thing's bigger than me.</p>
<p>Push it.</p>
<p>-He wakes up, you got my back, right? -Yeah.</p>
<p>Come on. Come on.</p>
<p>Okay, watch this. Off his nose, on the belly, on the floor. Check it.</p>
<p>Book.</p>
<p>Okay, now. He was sitting here, he was reading.</p>
<p>-Something fell on his head, and... -I got it.</p>
<p>Too light. Couldn't cause a bump like that.</p>
<p>I bet it could.</p>
<p>Would you cut it out? We need something bigger.</p>
<p>Can I have the apple?</p>
<p>What's with the look?</p>
<p>He's buying it.</p>
<p>He's not buying it.</p>
<p>He's buying it.</p>
<p>He's not buying it.</p>
<p>No, he's buying it.</p>
<p>Will you stop doing that?</p>
<p>Well, unless you get him a blindfold, I'm going to kick him!</p>
<p>Okay, let's go.</p>
<p>There. See? Good as new.</p>
<p>I'll tell you, this being in charge thing isn't so tough.</p>
<p>You know what I'm talking about? You know what I'm talking about. Yeah.</p>
<p>Yeah, hi. Hey, there. Having a good day? Yeah.</p>
<p>So, this was Otis's idea?</p>
<p>Oh, yeah. We're like the second line of defense.</p>
<p>We see or hear anything suspicious, and I just signal Otis with a crow.</p>
<p>And I've really been working on it. Listen.</p>
<p>Well, you know, in the moment, it'll be really strong.</p>
<p>But for now, we just stand watch.</p>
<p>Yeah, watch.</p>
<p>Come and get it!</p>
<p>Freddy, you okay?</p>
<p>Boneless white meat! What? I'm not hungry!</p>
<p>I mean, I don't wanna eat anyone... Thing... You...</p>
<p>What happened? What? What? What?</p>
<p>Okay, quick little once around the barnyard, then, hello, party!</p>
<p>Hey, look at this. It's our new inside connection.</p>
<p>Congrats, Otis.</p>
<p>Oh, will you look at that?</p>
<p>Don't wake up the cow.</p>
<p>That's called cowtipping.</p>
<p>Oh, that so steams me!</p>
<p>Man, I wish I could get a hold of that little... I would...</p>
<p>Hey, I'm in charge, right?</p>
<p>Oh, we are so talking. Are we not talking?</p>
<p>-Talking the talk and walking the walk. -Walkie-talkie, huh?</p>
<p>Let's go.</p>
<p>Then I said, &quot;That's called cowtipping.&quot;</p>
<p>I hear music over there again. Do you hear music?</p>
<p>That farmer's out of control.</p>
<p>We should call someone. We should call someone.</p>
<p>-I smell buttermilk. -Shut up! Shut up!</p>
<p>-What's that smell? -Stop it! Stop it!</p>
<p>Randall, there is a cow outside.</p>
<p>This is a cow farm. You're gonna find cows outside.</p>
<p>No, I mean right outside.</p>
<p>Right outside this house, looming like a ghost. Like a reaper.</p>
<p>No, cows don't like houses much.</p>
<p>They prefer it out in the meadow, where they can get a graze on.</p>
<p>Nathan Randall the Third, I am not crazy.</p>
<p>I am medicated for a chemical imbalance.</p>
<p>Don't you sit there and think that I am crazy.</p>
<p>Your mind's gone, woman.</p>
<p>Where'd it go? I don't know.</p>
<p>It's gone.</p>
<p>-Oh geez, you're on my foot again. -Sorry.</p>
<p>This is so sweet. This is so wicked sweet.</p>
<p>I love the new you, Otis.</p>
<p>Okay, lgg, you remember how to do this?</p>
<p>-Oh, he remembers. -I remember.</p>
<p>-Yeah, he remembers. -He's remembering.</p>
<p>Right now.</p>
<p>Well, pinch me, I'm dreaming. Here is a first.</p>
<p>Otis joining us on a joyride.</p>
<p>-That's the animal sin of sins, huh? -&quot;Sin of sins,&quot; I like that.</p>
<p>Hey, old Bud. Bud, you bring the stuff?</p>
<p>It's right here.</p>
<p>-Show it. Show it. -It's right here.</p>
<p>-Show it. -It's right here.</p>
<p>-Show it. -It's right there.</p>
<p>We're rebels! We're rebels!</p>
<p>We're the wildest!</p>
<p>There they are.</p>
<p>-Too bad we can't go in there. -Yeah.</p>
<p>Breaks my heart.</p>
<p>Now remember, honey, I told you,</p>
<p>we can't be staying out this late on a school night.</p>
<p>&quot;We can't be staying out late.&quot;</p>
<p>Whatever. I'll do what I want.</p>
<p>Do what I want, when I want, 'cause I want to do it.</p>
<p>You've come to the wrong place.</p>
<p>-What is that? -I'm lactose intolerant.</p>
<p>-Oh, man. -Here we go. I know.</p>
<p>-One, two... -Yeah.</p>
<p>Two, yeah.</p>
<p>Moo!</p>
<p>That's called boytipping!</p>
<p>-Let's get out of here! -Come on, move it!</p>
<p>Let me out!</p>
<p>Okay, go!</p>
<p>Never go to meadows. Never go to meadows.</p>
<p>Never go to meadows. Never go to meadows.</p>
<p>Treat cows nicely.</p>
<p>Okay, no more Red Bull.</p>
<p>Put crowns on our heads, 'cause we are the kings!</p>
<p>Did you see his face?</p>
<p>-Price... -Less.</p>
<p>-Price... -Less.</p>
<p>-Pr... -lce...</p>
<p>Less.</p>
<p>A toast! To a new world order.</p>
<p>We are calling the shots now!</p>
<p>-Yeah, it's all about us now. -You've got that right, Otis.</p>
<p>Nothing can touch us.</p>
<p>Oh, man! Oh, man!</p>
<p>-Oh, man! -Man, oh, man!</p>
<p>Let me out! You gotta let me out!</p>
<p>Pull over to the side of the road.</p>
<p>Oh, no, they're talking to us now.</p>
<p>Pull over! You gotta pull over!</p>
<p>We can't pull over!</p>
<p>Hang on!</p>
<p>What could be worse than this?</p>
<p>What we got here is probably some teenagers</p>
<p>going out for a joyride in their mom's car.</p>
<p>Yeah, we'll shake them up a bit, send them home. You know kids.</p>
<p>Nothing a little strip search won't cure, yeah.</p>
<p>Is this thing still on?</p>
<p>Is that a camera?</p>
<p>-This is it. Goodbye. -They're taping Cops.</p>
<p>Mommy! Mooo-mmy!</p>
<p>Hey, relax. We can lose them. I mean, it's just a car, right?</p>
<p>It's a chopper! It's a chopper!</p>
<p>We're gonna die!</p>
<p>We interrupt this program with a breaking news story. Police are in...</p>
<p>Would you look at that? The world is going crazy.</p>
<p>These kids get all hopped up on Diet Coke and Jolly Ranchers and just...</p>
<p>That's our car!</p>
<p>That was a hoof. There's a cow in our car! That is a hoof!</p>
<p>Yes, this is Nora Beady.</p>
<p>What do you mean, &quot;What now?&quot;</p>
<p>My car is on TV, and I think there's a cow in it.</p>
<p>And I saw a cow outside my window. I think they may be linked.</p>
<p>Don't think I can't call again, Gary.</p>
<p>Oh, that's nice. Good.</p>
<p>They're gonna catch us and they're gonna dissect us.</p>
<p>We are ditching out!</p>
<p>Two all-beef patties, that's our future!</p>
<p>Out! Run!</p>
<p>-Run! -Stop touching me!</p>
<p>They're making a run for it. Let's go. Come on.</p>
<p>This is Gray Badger in Chopper 219. We've got suspects in sight.</p>
<p>I'm chafing!</p>
<p>Okay. Hurry up, fellows. They're right over there.</p>
<p>Oh, milk me!</p>
<p>Okay, here we go! Here we go!</p>
<p>Milk me!</p>
<p>Geez, these guys are big.</p>
<p>I see them over there.</p>
<p>Cut it right!</p>
<p>We got them!</p>
<p>Could you guys believe that? Did you guys see me?</p>
<p>Me, I am fearless, baby.</p>
<p>-Oh, yeah, fear... -Less.</p>
<p>I think I rolled over my foot.</p>
<p>We left it the same way we found it.</p>
<p>Okay, toodle-oo, Otis. Same time tomorrow night?</p>
<p>Hey, guys, can you imagine Ben doing something like that?</p>
<p>-No way. No way. -We'd be in trouble.</p>
<p>-Trou... -Ble.</p>
<p>Okay, explain to me exactly why are we doing this?</p>
<p>Because it's what my dad would do.</p>
<p>Why don't you just go have fun, all right? I can do this.</p>
<p>No way. We're homeboys. I'm here with you.</p>
<p>Really, it's all right.</p>
<p>Okay, I tried! Later, dude.</p>
<p>I'll bring you back a drink or something. Be back.</p>
<p>Come on back, I'm right here.</p>
<p>Mind if I join you?</p>
<p>No. I mean, sure. I no mind you...</p>
<p>Geez, I can't even talk to you!</p>
<p>Hang on a second.</p>
<p>Here. You know, just let me...</p>
<p>No, I can still sit on my own, I think.</p>
<p>Oh, my gosh! Oh, my gosh, the baby's coming!</p>
<p>What?</p>
<p>I made you jump.</p>
<p>Nice. Nice. Thank you. I about swallowed my cud.</p>
<p>-It's beautiful, isn't it? -My cud?</p>
<p>-The night. -Yeah, that, too. Yeah, it's nice.</p>
<p>My dad had a thing about stars.</p>
<p>-Tell me, what was he like? -My pop?</p>
<p>He was amazing. Bigger than life, you know?</p>
<p>Funny, we're not even related.</p>
<p>He found me and he took me in.</p>
<p>I never thought about it before, but everything he did was for me.</p>
<p>He's the only family I've ever known.</p>
<p>The last time we talked, he told me that the night he found me</p>
<p>he looked up into the sky and he said that the stars...</p>
<p>God, I miss him.</p>
<p>What about you? I mean, if that's too personal, you know.</p>
<p>If I'm overstepping like a boundary or...</p>
<p>You know what? Too bad. Cough it up.</p>
<p>Okay.</p>
<p>Well, where do I start?</p>
<p>I was married, and life was good.</p>
<p>Yeah. It seems like forever ago now, but...</p>
<p>One day, a bad storm rolled in.</p>
<p>Bessy and I were in the meadow and we found a place on high ground.</p>
<p>But when we went home,</p>
<p>well, everyone was gone.</p>
<p>You know what I think?</p>
<p>I think some good things are gonna start happening to you and me.</p>
<p>What, do you wanna be a hero, cow?</p>
<p>Hey, you're Ben's kid.</p>
<p>Otis, right?</p>
<p>So they left you in charge?</p>
<p>Oh, that's precious.</p>
<p>You thought you could fill his shoes?</p>
<p>Otis, where were you?</p>
<p>Were you off having fun? Laughing with your barnyard buddies?</p>
<p>Yeah, you could have made a difference had you been there for him,</p>
<p>but you weren't. Were you?</p>
<p>Okay, from here on out, this is the way it's gonna work.</p>
<p>We show up, you look the other way.</p>
<p>A few animals missing here and there.</p>
<p>Hey, it's the natural order of things.</p>
<p>It'll be our little secret.</p>
<p>Oh, and Ben's kid,</p>
<p>if you should think about getting a sudden burst of courage,</p>
<p>we slaughter every animal in sight.</p>
<p>Now, you go back, make everyone feel all safe,</p>
<p>and we'll be seeing you tomorrow night. That's a date.</p>
<p>See you around.</p>
<p>&quot;Round.&quot; You're fat.</p>
<p>Hey, Pop.</p>
<p>I wanted to come by and...</p>
<p>Look, you were just a great dad.</p>
<p>You see, l...</p>
<p>I don't know what I was thinking, but, for a minute, I actually thought</p>
<p>I could take your place.</p>
<p>But those coyotes?</p>
<p>I mean, you'd have stood up to them and you wouldn't have backed down.</p>
<p>I gotta tell you, I was so afraid.</p>
<p>You know, I know I always said that I wasn't you, and I'm not.</p>
<p>But I wish I was.</p>
<p>I can't do it, Pop.</p>
<p>I gotta go.</p>
<p>I'm sorry.</p>
<p>And Duke will handle things, and everything will be fine.</p>
<p>Wait. What are you talking about?</p>
<p>Could you just not say anything?</p>
<p>Okay, I don't want to make a big thing about this.</p>
<p>Hey, everybody! Otis is leaving the barnyard!</p>
<p>-What's going on? -I don't believe it.</p>
<p>Oat, seriously,</p>
<p>I mean, you and me, we're like best friends.</p>
<p>No, Pip. It's over!</p>
<p>I'm leaving, all right? No big whoop. Continue your day.</p>
<p>Come on, Otis, we'll do what you say.</p>
<p>That's the point. I don't want you to do what I say.</p>
<p>I don't want any of you to have to listen to me.</p>
<p>Don't listen to him!</p>
<p>Stop doing what I say!</p>
<p>Okay, so what you're saying is, you'll stay if we don't do what you say.</p>
<p>Dead bee.</p>
<p>Thanks.</p>
<p>Again, alive.</p>
<p>Duke, you're in charge. Get the dogs together.</p>
<p>You guys can handle things better than I ever could.</p>
<p>Sure, Otis. If you say.</p>
<p>I've got my own life to lead, all right? I don't belong here anymore.</p>
<p>-Hi. -Hey.</p>
<p>What happened, Otis? Oh, please don't say, &quot;Nothing.&quot;</p>
<p>Look, it's complicated.</p>
<p>If you're hurting, let me help. I'd like to help.</p>
<p>You know what happened? I froze. Okay?</p>
<p>Last night, I didn't run the coyotes off. I couldn't do anything.</p>
<p>They're gonna come back tonight, and I can't protect anyone.</p>
<p>Everyone here, they all trust me. And I can't protect a single one of them.</p>
<p>Otis, the best leader isn't the biggest or the strongest.</p>
<p>The best leader is the one who cares the most.</p>
<p>Yeah, that's a nice thought, Daisy. That's a really nice thought.</p>
<p>I'll tell you one thing. I am really going to miss Bessy.</p>
<p>Okay. If this is what you have to do, I understand.</p>
<p>But I just want you to know one thing.</p>
<p>Even if you do leave, I believe in you.</p>
<p>Otis! Otis!</p>
<p>All right, Peck, take it easy. What's the matter?</p>
<p>They took... We got to... Come on!</p>
<p>I found him, guys!</p>
<p>Otis, the coyotes. It just happened.</p>
<p>They took Etta, Hanna, maybe six, seven others, I don't know.</p>
<p>They've never come during the day before.</p>
<p>They knew I wouldn't be expecting them until tonight.</p>
<p>They played me.</p>
<p>-What? -Nothing.</p>
<p>Otis, they took Maddie.</p>
<p>Those coyotes are strong.</p>
<p>What?</p>
<p>The coyotes, they're strong.</p>
<p>I was just wondering what a stronger man might do.</p>
<p>-You'll look after things? -Be proud to.</p>
<p>I'll be back.</p>
<p>-I'm going, too. -No, Pip, stay here.</p>
<p>You can't do this alone. They could kill you.</p>
<p>Yeah, I guess they could.</p>
<p>It's nice that you ladies could join us this evening.</p>
<p>Thank you for being so patient. We prefer dining at night.</p>
<p>You're a wonderful species.</p>
<p>I love chicken. My favorite part is the skin.</p>
<p>You're a big meanie.</p>
<p>-What? -You're a meaner.</p>
<p>Meaner, meaner. Meaners got to eat, too.</p>
<p>Leave her alone.</p>
<p>This one's mine.</p>
<p>Cook her while I have the little one for an appetizer.</p>
<p>You know, because I'm a meaner.</p>
<p>Put the chick down, Dag.</p>
<p>-Otis! -Oaty!</p>
<p>We suddenly got a burst of courage, did we?</p>
<p>Okay. All right.</p>
<p>Well, first, what I'm gonna do is I'm gonna take that chick from you.</p>
<p>Then, while you're picking yourself up off the ground,</p>
<p>I'm gonna gather up the hens and I'm gonna leave.</p>
<p>And exactly how do you propose you're going to do that?</p>
<p>Kill him!</p>
<p>Well, I know what's right</p>
<p>I got just one life</p>
<p>In a world that keeps on pushing me around</p>
<p>But I'll stand my ground</p>
<p>And I won't back down</p>
<p>Hey, baby</p>
<p>There ain't no easy way out</p>
<p>Hey</p>
<p>I will stand my ground</p>
<p>And I won't back down</p>
<p>Oh, you like that, yeah?</p>
<p>That should do. That should do.</p>
<p>Well, look at the hero.</p>
<p>You thought you could come into my den?</p>
<p>Now, why don't you lay there and watch</p>
<p>while we eat your friends?</p>
<p>What's this?</p>
<p>A strong man stands up for himself.</p>
<p>A stronger man stands up for others.</p>
<p>This should be fun.</p>
<p>I smell fear.</p>
<p>Shoot! I told you they can smell it!</p>
<p>They can smell it?</p>
<p>Oh, yeah, I have it. I have a lot of it.</p>
<p>Just stick near me, guys, and you'll be all right.</p>
<p>Yeah, I'll watch your juicy back.</p>
<p>I mean, your regular back.</p>
<p>-Hey! -Sorry, man.</p>
<p>They're just pellets. I'm nervous.</p>
<p>That's your army?</p>
<p>Something tells me you may want to take a couple steps back.</p>
<p>Here we come!</p>
<p>-Here comes trou... -Ble!</p>
<p>-Trou... -Ble!</p>
<p>-Trou... -Ble!</p>
<p>Pip, talk me into it. Talk me into it.</p>
<p>Flip the lid a little bit. You're mad! You're a pig!</p>
<p>-You're mad! -Let's do this!</p>
<p>You know what I'm gonna do? I'm gonna go right in your ear!</p>
<p>There's a mouse in my ear! There's a mouse in my ear!</p>
<p>Oh, yeah. Step on it, baby!</p>
<p>All right, come on. Give me your best shot.</p>
<p>Oh, sorry. Here. You know what? Let me give you a hand.</p>
<p>Yeah, give him the puncher! Smack him!</p>
<p>Well, well, whatever will I do?</p>
<p>Oh, don't worry, I got something special for you.</p>
<p>I just love that little guy.</p>
<p>Come on, hurry.</p>
<p>-No! -Hi!</p>
<p>It tastes like chicken!</p>
<p>Chicken!</p>
<p>Chick, chick, chickity-chick, chicken!</p>
<p>Come here, you furry, four-legged chickens!</p>
<p>Take it easy, man.</p>
<p>Come on, what you got going? There's nothing there.</p>
<p>Hey, Otis, look out!</p>
<p>-Behind you! -Watch out!</p>
<p>Watch out!</p>
<p>Look behind you.</p>
<p>Remember me?</p>
<p>I'm Ben's kid.</p>
<p>Never come back!</p>
<p>-Pip? -I'd have to go with the iron, man.</p>
<p>Then I said I was gonna hit him with a stick.</p>
<p>We know. We know. I heard you say that.</p>
<p>Quite a night, huh?</p>
<p>We took down the coyotes, Peck learned to crow,</p>
<p>and by the time we get back,</p>
<p>we'll have a new member of the barnyard running around.</p>
<p>Daisy. She like went into labor after you left.</p>
<p>-Daisy's... -She's having her baby, dude.</p>
<p>What you think was gonna happen?</p>
<p>She would just keep getting bigger or something?</p>
<p>-ls she all right? We've gotta get back. -Yeah.</p>
<p>Doubtful we'll make it back in time walking.</p>
<p>I'm sure she's gonna be all right, Otis.</p>
<p>Miles, I've got to be there.</p>
<p>Please remember, mister, that I am a lady.</p>
<p>When you are with me, your eyes are on me, not her.</p>
<p>We can call and tell them where to pick them up.</p>
<p>Car!</p>
<p>Righteous!</p>
<p>Duke, what's happening?</p>
<p>Otis, come on. You know, I think... I'm pretty sure... Yeah, it's time.</p>
<p>Boy.</p>
<p>Otis, I was so worried.</p>
<p>Worried about what? I so had that covered.</p>
<p>It's okay, I'm here.</p>
<p>And I'm here for you, too.</p>
<p>Okay, girl, you're doing fine. Now, just breathe.</p>
<p>Man, that looks like it hurts.</p>
<p>Oh, that's very profound, lnsight-Man.</p>
<p>Well, excuse me for being a pig.</p>
<p>How come nothing's happened yet?</p>
<p>She's gonna be all right, though, huh?</p>
<p>Yeah, like, like... What if it gets stuck or something?</p>
<p>What? You mean like stuck halfway, so she'd be a cow and a half?</p>
<p>I didn't say &quot;cow and a half.&quot;</p>
<p>Yes, you did. You just did.</p>
<p>-Hey, Duke, did I say &quot;Cow and a half&quot;? -I'm not doing this.</p>
<p>No, look.</p>
<p>It's a beautiful little boy.</p>
<p>Go ahead.</p>
<p>He's perfect.</p>
<p>What are you gonna name him?</p>
<p>I was thinking I kind of like</p>
<p>Ben.</p>
<p>Oh, I think that's just great.</p>
<p>Hey, there, little Ben.</p>
<p>Hey, there, little buddy. Look at you.</p>
<p>Look at my little buddy.</p>
<p>Here you go.</p>
<p>Hey, Otis, we were all talking,</p>
<p>and we know you may have other plans, we understand that,</p>
<p>but we really, really appreciate what you did around here.</p>
<p>And, well, we were wondering, I don't know,</p>
<p>if maybe you planned on staying around a little longer?</p>
<p>Freedom is a song</p>
<p>Freedom is a spirit</p>
<p>To take another's hand</p>
<p>I'll just say this,</p>
<p>as long as I'm still kicking,</p>
<p>no animal will be harmed inside that fence.</p>
<p>High paw!</p>
<p>Hey, all right.</p>
<p>Freedom is a song</p>
<p>Freedom is a spirit</p>
<p>For people who are strong</p>
<p>Freedom is a spirit</p>
<p>Freedom is a land</p>
<p>Freedom is the courage</p>
<p>To take another's hand</p>
<p>I, Nora Beady, am a precious object</p>
<p>and shall treat myself as such.</p>
<p>Gosh, I wonder why... I forgot to use conditioner or...</p>
]]></description>
<pubDate>2009-01-04 00:06:22</pubDate>
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